Review: "He Never Dies" is the third installment in the ever so infamous series, "Guinea Pig". As a contrast to "Flowers of Flesh and Blood" and "Devil's Experiment", "He Never Dies" comes off as a comedy with somewhat of a plot. To put it bluntly, this is basically a slapstick comedy with A LOT of gore.

The film begins with this random white professor telling us about a strange phenomenon where a guy couldn't kill himself. Then it shows us our protagonist, Hideshi, trying to cut his wrist but chickening out. Then it proceeds to give us a motive to his suicide attempt. We see a day at his work place and all he does is get scolded and made fun of. Plus, he loses the office's only hot girl to the office stud. Seriously, the three out of four actresses are hideously ugly. You'd think the film would only try to scare you with the insane gore, but no! They go on to show you the three ugliest girls you will ever see in your life. Anyways, after all the "sympathizing" with the character and "understanding" him, he returns to his apartment and the fun is about to start.

Oh wait, false alarm. We cut back to the random professor again. I don't know, having this professor here gives this movie a somewhat campy feel. I mean, the guy's totally useless. He's just there because the director has no faith in the audience, and thinks we're too stupid to see what the he's trying to do so we need to be bashed over the head by it. So anyways, then the meat of the movie starts.

This movie seriously gives really good laughs. Before Hideshi begins his crazy self mutilation, he does some of the funniest slapstick routines I have ever seen. His delivery of every joke is just so goofy and fun-loving, you almost forget you're about to watch him mutilate himself. Well, after awhile, he finally cuts his wrist. At first, he's horrified. He's about to leave this Earth once and for all. After about two minutes of cowering into a corner, he realizes he doesn't feel pain and begins to plain with his wound. Then from there on, it's a mix of crazy gore and goofy humor. I wouldn't call sitting down and watching this a trial. Most of the special effects are visibly of fake. Regardless, my friend and I couldn't stop laughing and then being disgusted and going back to laughing. This film really balances the humor and gore well. Even though you see some sick stuff, the most disturbing part of the film is the end when the professor comes back on. He tells us what we had just seen, and then proceeds on to tell us we could be the second immortal being on this planet. My goodness, the damn guy is encouraging us to do the same as Hideshi! Twisted!

I really don't even know how to review this movie. If you're a gore hound, this is like a diet Pepsi for you. It's not quite as good as Pepsi, but it's a good substitute. But then again, if you don't like Pepsi, you won't be touching it with a 20-foot pole. I personally enjoyed it. If you can stomach the grotesque scenes and not let it disturb you; and enjoy Troma films as well as Peter Jackon's "Dead Alive", then I wouldn't mind recommending "He Never Dies". If you can't, well, stay as far away from this as Earthly possible.